Throwback: Reflect Not Deflect

I thought this was a good Throwback Thursday Blog….. I see so much hate and Bullying daily about EVERYTHING! I wish people would take time to reflect… spread kindness.. respect others OPINIONS… and look at themselves and ask are they being kind? are they being Hypocrites? people have a right to disagree, without being labeled and libeled……

 

 

Sunday night in the middle of the night my oldest son started texting me, I kept hearing Luke Combs text tone over and over. You see I have one of his ringtones attached to my son’s number. Luke is my favorite country singer and my son reminds me of him. As much as I love hearing Luke’s songs, I wasn’t happy that my son was texting over and over so late.

I grabbed my phone to see what was so important. Of course as soon as I read his texts, my heart broke. He was letting me know about the senseless murder of people at a Country Music fest, which Luke Combs actually happened to be performing at.

I thought to myself once again Hate rears it’s despicable head. I started watching the news and looking on social media, another coward had decided to shoot innocent people. I will never understand how people can be so full of hate.

I felt so helpless and full of hurt as I watched the footage. I couldn’t fall back asleep, so I laid in bed watching classic TV to try to calm down. I knew I was going to need to talk with Peyton when he woke up, about once again about how evil people can be. I feel like I am always having this discussion.

We have talked with him about bullies and people who choose to deflect their issues rather than reflect, but mass shootings aren’t easy to explain. Peyton is very sweet and gentle and doesn’t understand why people are so mean.

I really don’t have words for this latest display of hateful violence. Daily I see people attacking each other on twitter because they disagree. I started calling it slanderous bullying.

Peyton has asked me several times why people have to be so mean just because they don’t like who someone voted for. I’ve tried to explain to him that many times people take it as a personal attack against their views,rather than everyone is entitled to their own opinions. I really am on my last nerve with some of the offensive & slanderous “name tags” being put on people.

It’s a bit puzzling to me how people can sit on social media and name call, finger point and make “threats” then say they disdain bullies. This justification of anything goes because someone else said something you disagree with HAS TO STOP!

My prayer and hope is that people look inside of themselves, instead of deflect.

We can’t control what others say & do, but we can control ourselves.

If we choose to not play the game of verbal violence, maybe just maybe others will stop as well. Let’s all make a vow to tone down the rhetoric. While words are only words, they can lead to more.

I hope we can return good for evil, reflect not deflect, open our hearts and minds, disagree with respect and support causes not agendas! While this won’t stop evil, it’s a great start and we need to start somewhere because if we don’t I am not sure what will happen.

The Park Bench

I wrote this piece several years ago for my book… I read it every so often and I remind myself it will be Okay.

There are times I really do worry about what is going to happen to Peyton, after I am gone… After my husband is gone… I know he has three older siblings, and I know they love him unconditionally… But I still worry.

I worry that I’m not giving him enough in his life… There’s so many things parents of adult children with autism, worry about… We don’t always talk about them… But they are very real and in our mind, and in our thoughts and in our hearts…

When I get really stressed about it, I read this piece… And I remind myself Peyton is not alone… Rather he is surrounded in love, and I have that faith that whether I’m here or gone… That love Will stay around him.

I can only do what I can do and plan for his future.Stressing isn’t going to help…planning is.

So as we celebrate this holiday season and we come to the end of the year where we all make our New Year’s resolutions… Let’s each and everyone of us pause, and realize what is the most important… That we are there for those who need us, and we surround them with love.

I see a park bench alone, no one pays attention to it. It reminds me of my son… You see my child is autistic, he fights battles every day I can’t even imagine. As I see the park bench all alone even though there are people everywhere.. I realize how my son must feel. Connecting with others isn’t always easy for him, my heart hurts… But I also become more determined to help him. I look around me and I see the beauty of nature that surrounds the bench. It soothes me and heals me… There are so many wonderful things about nature… I am re-invigorated as I walk away from the park bench. I look back at it sitting empty, I stop and smile… As children run up to it and compete to all sit on the bench. It’s at that moment, that I suddenly realize my son will be fine… as he really isn’t alone… He has us, and we love him unconditionally.. We see his strengths.

As always, thank you so much for reading my blog and for following us on our 45 Awesomism days of the holidays. Without everyone’s support we wouldn’t be able to accomplish the things that we are. I hope you’re enjoying it and we look forward to “talking” to you again tomorrow!

have an awesome day

My hope for this Thanksgiving

I wrote this post 3 years ago, Thanksgiving… I had hoped and prayed that by now we would have healed some. I really do not think we have and I am not sure we ever will…

It seems as though it has now spilled over into all parts of daily life.

While I can’t change the behavior of others, I can change mine… so I am hoping that enough of us stand up and say… IT IS OKAY to disagree.. We do not all have to agree in fact that would be very boring! Let’s embrace our differences and pull in our disrespect… Agree to disagree and treat each other with respect…

Disagreement is healthy, when done right. Stop labeling everyone a BULLY BECAUSE THEY HAVE A DIFFERENT OPINION.

Together we are stronger!

 

 

We wish each of you a very happy Thanksgiving! This time of the year everyone asks “what are you thankful for?” and we list the usual..family, friends, health, home etc….

While these are all very important things to be thankful for …..there are Other things we should be thankful for.

We live in the greatest country in the world, where I truly believe most people care about others. At times it seems like this isn’t true, but I think the “loud ones” get the attention. No matter what you think about who won the election, what you should be thankful for is the fact we not only have the freedom to vote for who we want, but to voice what we feel. Although, I am disheartened by the slanderous and hateful rhetoric I hear from some. I have seen some say horrible and blatant untruths about people who disagree with them, this is a dangerous slope and cooler heads and HEARTS need to prevail.

I don’t want this to be a lecture on politics, but rather my thoughts on common decency. I have seen people say they aren’t welcome at family members’ homes because of who they voted for. This is very troubling and to be honest pathetic… If we as a country can’t have respectful debates, we will fail, and I for one am not willing to sit by and accept that.

So while we all celebrate Thanksgiving, let’s make a common vow that we treat one another with respect. I am not asking that we all agree, because as my dad taught me, healthy debate encourages inner reflection and expansion of views.

I hope this holiday season is that we treat one another with compassion and respect. When we try to squash the views of those who disagree with us by name calling and bullying, we in a sense are squashing their rights. As I said earlier this is a dangerous slope.

I am reminded of a George Washington’s quote ” If freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter” My hope for us as a nation is that we heal. So next year when we are asked what we are most thankful for I hope on everyone’s list is “That we have healed as a nation and truly show one another respect” image

The Strength of Texans

I decided to revisit this blog for a couple of reasons….. We have had some bad weather in Texas again lately, and once again… I saw the best come out in people…. and another reason… because I really hope that people focus on the best… even while going through tough times… that is a Life Lesson for always…Hope you enjoy this blog!

 

 

 

As most of you know this past week or so has been an almost surreal time in Texas. As I was thinking about writing this blog, I struggled with how to write this. I want to make sure I make this about everyone who was affected and everyone who gave so selflessly, not about me.

I have been through other Hurricanes as I lived in Florida for many years. I honestly wasn’t stressed about this one, as I figured it would be a day of storms and then we’d be done. As the storm got closer and the weather people became truly stressed, I started to worry. I didn’t want Peyton to know I was worried, as he tends to really stress whenever any storms are happening. I saw him sitting in his massage chair, quite a bit so I knew he was well aware there was some “danger” heading toward us.

Friday night the storm started, we all started to realize this was going to be big, little did many of us realize just how big. Harvey came and he didn’t leave, he seemed to have a love for Texas, like so many of us. The problem was he wasn’t good to us. No matter how awful Harvey was, Texas was stronger. The will, resolve and love of the people of Texas was shown over and over. That love, that determination and resolve was watched by people all over the world. The people watching decided they needed and wanted to help, I truly believe they helped because they saw Texans as awesome people. No one cared what color skin, ethnicity, religion you were, or who you voted for….they cared that you loved, cared, and believed in the goodness of EVERYONE! A week before Harvey came, this country was coming apart at the seams. The people of Houston and of Texas grabbed a huge needle and thread and not only repaired the tear, but did it with love. I sat glued to channel 13, abc news. I cried, I laughed and I cheered as I watched the “Cajun Navy” and many, many, many others come. People grabbed everything they could and went out risking their lives, to save EVERYONE. The resolve and strength of people was overwhelming to me. Whole families’ belongings were reduced to a garbage bag and even sometimes a small grocery bag. Yet, when many were interviewed they were so thankful to be alive. They focused on the positive, thanked those who saved them, and chose to see the silver lining.

This is what is great about Texans, they see what unites them, not what divides them. Oh I know there are some who choose to be negative, but they are a small number, and like Harvey will fade away into the background. Now comes the really hard part… The rebuilding for so, so many… But just like when Harvey was trying to break our will and our spirit. I truly believe we will see the strength, resolve, compassion and love of Texans. That huge needle and thread will become a hammer, saw and nails. I hope the world keeps watching because Texans believe in actions, not words and the lessons they teach are Huge, because everything is bigger in Texas! We are Houston Strong, We are Texas Strong! I am sure Harvey and maybe even a few others learned….Don’t Mess with Texas!

Faith it until you make it

Faith it until you make it… I saw this quote a few weeks ago… And I absolutely fell in love with it. You usually hear the term fake it until you make it. I think many of us fake it until we make it to a certain degree, when we are entrepreneurs, small business owners, pursuing our dreams etc. etc. But is that what we really want to be a faker?

The more I thought about this “Faith it until you make it” the more I loved it. The more raw and real it became to me.

I think we all have different versions of what our faith, or what faith is. This blog is not a lecture about what your faith should be by definition… But more about having that positive thoughts and conviction… To stay strong while you work to fill your dreams and passions.

I happen to be a person of faith, I believe in the power of prayer, I believe in a strong inner commitment to do what is right, not only for yourself, but for others.

This is not to say that I am always perfect. I am far from perfect… I make mistakes, I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life… But I try very hard to learn from them.

My dad always tried to teach me it was only a mistake if I didn’t learn from it… Otherwise it was a life’s lesson. I do truly try to learn from my mistakes. So let’s just say I have lots and lots of life’s lessons. 😂

I think nowadays, we have developed an attitude of what we want, we better have and we better have it NOW! There are times, I must admit, that I can become very disheartened with the way that we have become in society in general.

Too often I don’t see people actually caring about other people, I see them talking about what they do ….what they have… how great they are.. basically faking it till they make it.

This is not to say that we should do the opposite, which is always complain… And do a “poor me” attitude, either.

Life in general can be really tough… Being a small business/entrepreneur/independent contractor can make it even tougher.

Having other issues in your life such as.. being a single parent… A child with special needs… Serious financial difficulties etc. etc. can also make being positive, a little more difficult at times.

This is why I love that saying… Faith it till you make it… Because I think when things are really rough, we have to lean on our faith! We need to reach down deep inside of us and find that Faith… Be it Faith in a higher being.. Faith in ourselves or Both!

The Definition of Faith is: ( from Oxford)

faith
1.
complete trust or confidence in someone or something.
“this restores one’s faith in politicians”
2.
strong belief in God or in the doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof.

I have made this my personal new motto…meaning when tough times come… and they always do…especially being a Mompreneur/Entrepreneur and Autism Mom… I am going to challenge myself… Faith it until I make it! Will you accept this challenge too?

Thanks for reading my blog

Have an Awesome Day!

Lynne