My hope for this Thanksgiving

I wrote this post 3 years ago, Thanksgiving… I had hoped and prayed that by now we would have healed some. I really do not think we have and I am not sure we ever will…

It seems as though it has now spilled over into all parts of daily life.

While I can’t change the behavior of others, I can change mine… so I am hoping that enough of us stand up and say… IT IS OKAY to disagree.. We do not all have to agree in fact that would be very boring! Let’s embrace our differences and pull in our disrespect… Agree to disagree and treat each other with respect…

Disagreement is healthy, when done right. Stop labeling everyone a BULLY BECAUSE THEY HAVE A DIFFERENT OPINION.

Together we are stronger!

 

 

We wish each of you a very happy Thanksgiving! This time of the year everyone asks “what are you thankful for?” and we list the usual..family, friends, health, home etc….

While these are all very important things to be thankful for …..there are Other things we should be thankful for.

We live in the greatest country in the world, where I truly believe most people care about others. At times it seems like this isn’t true, but I think the “loud ones” get the attention. No matter what you think about who won the election, what you should be thankful for is the fact we not only have the freedom to vote for who we want, but to voice what we feel. Although, I am disheartened by the slanderous and hateful rhetoric I hear from some. I have seen some say horrible and blatant untruths about people who disagree with them, this is a dangerous slope and cooler heads and HEARTS need to prevail.

I don’t want this to be a lecture on politics, but rather my thoughts on common decency. I have seen people say they aren’t welcome at family members’ homes because of who they voted for. This is very troubling and to be honest pathetic… If we as a country can’t have respectful debates, we will fail, and I for one am not willing to sit by and accept that.

So while we all celebrate Thanksgiving, let’s make a common vow that we treat one another with respect. I am not asking that we all agree, because as my dad taught me, healthy debate encourages inner reflection and expansion of views.

I hope this holiday season is that we treat one another with compassion and respect. When we try to squash the views of those who disagree with us by name calling and bullying, we in a sense are squashing their rights. As I said earlier this is a dangerous slope.

I am reminded of a George Washington’s quote ” If freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter” My hope for us as a nation is that we heal. So next year when we are asked what we are most thankful for I hope on everyone’s list is “That we have healed as a nation and truly show one another respect” image

Nature does not hurry

I absolutely love a good cup of tea and about a week and a half ago I was making myself a traditional medicinal tea.

I was feeling a little bit under the weather and had a sore throat, so I decided to make myself a really strong cup of throat tea. On the little paper tag of each teabag there was a saying and this particular bag it said “nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished. By LAO Tzu.

This really got me thinking… There’s so much wisdom in that saying, nature doesn’t hurry… a flower doesn’t grow overnight… a tree doesn’t grow in a day… There’s so many things about nature that are very slow and methodical… Yet nature somehow always gets it done.

Sometimes it’s not things we want to have done such as hurricanes, bad storms, floods tornadoes etc. but other times there’s so much beauty in nature, we have some of the most beautiful flowers… the clouds are just gorgeous!

I love to lay down and look at the clouds in the sky and try to find either animals or cartoon characters or pictures within the clouds…

I’ve been fortunate enough that I’ve traveled into a lot of places in the world, and I’ve seen so many different parts of nature… I’ve seen lakes, I’ve seen Rivers.. I’ve seen mighty oceans I’ve seen mountains.. I’ve seen deserts… I’ve seen flatland’s.. I’ve seen Hill country.. I’ve seen unbelievably gorgeous Forests… And they all have one thing in common… they are there for our viewing, and for us to learn from, and for us to enjoy and for us to see.

The more I thought about that saying as I was sipping my tea the more I realized… I so often put myself on this list! I feel like I have to get this done, I have to get that done! Now there are somethings in life we have to get done.. like we have to pay bills on time, we have to make sure that we eat each day, that we take care of ourselves if we’re sick or just make sure that things are done!

We have to go to work, we have to cook or clean or do other Daily or weekly chores… I get that but there’s so many things that we put on our self each and every day that we feel like we are against a clock…

Or maybe we don’t vacuum the carpet today, maybe we put it off for a day or two… Instead of vacuuming maybe we go outside and sit and look at the clouds above… What is wrong with that? nothing!!

It allows us a time to mentally, physically, spiritually and emotionally “ Grow“ I know for myself I need that time… I need that downtime. Time where I allow myself to refresh, to just relax to take life.. just one small step…

I have written other blogs about slowing down… Why run when you can walk… And I do try… But as I sat there with my sore throat drinking my medicinal tea, I thought to myself this “Could not have come at a better time… I don’t need to hurry… One way or another I will get it all accomplished”…

So my stress and my anxiety can be put on the back burner… And my mental, emotional, spiritual and physical health will be put on the front burner… Because at the end of the day nature doesn’t Hurry yet everything is accomplished!

The Strength of Texans

I decided to revisit this blog for a couple of reasons….. We have had some bad weather in Texas again lately, and once again… I saw the best come out in people…. and another reason… because I really hope that people focus on the best… even while going through tough times… that is a Life Lesson for always…Hope you enjoy this blog!

 

 

 

As most of you know this past week or so has been an almost surreal time in Texas. As I was thinking about writing this blog, I struggled with how to write this. I want to make sure I make this about everyone who was affected and everyone who gave so selflessly, not about me.

I have been through other Hurricanes as I lived in Florida for many years. I honestly wasn’t stressed about this one, as I figured it would be a day of storms and then we’d be done. As the storm got closer and the weather people became truly stressed, I started to worry. I didn’t want Peyton to know I was worried, as he tends to really stress whenever any storms are happening. I saw him sitting in his massage chair, quite a bit so I knew he was well aware there was some “danger” heading toward us.

Friday night the storm started, we all started to realize this was going to be big, little did many of us realize just how big. Harvey came and he didn’t leave, he seemed to have a love for Texas, like so many of us. The problem was he wasn’t good to us. No matter how awful Harvey was, Texas was stronger. The will, resolve and love of the people of Texas was shown over and over. That love, that determination and resolve was watched by people all over the world. The people watching decided they needed and wanted to help, I truly believe they helped because they saw Texans as awesome people. No one cared what color skin, ethnicity, religion you were, or who you voted for….they cared that you loved, cared, and believed in the goodness of EVERYONE! A week before Harvey came, this country was coming apart at the seams. The people of Houston and of Texas grabbed a huge needle and thread and not only repaired the tear, but did it with love. I sat glued to channel 13, abc news. I cried, I laughed and I cheered as I watched the “Cajun Navy” and many, many, many others come. People grabbed everything they could and went out risking their lives, to save EVERYONE. The resolve and strength of people was overwhelming to me. Whole families’ belongings were reduced to a garbage bag and even sometimes a small grocery bag. Yet, when many were interviewed they were so thankful to be alive. They focused on the positive, thanked those who saved them, and chose to see the silver lining.

This is what is great about Texans, they see what unites them, not what divides them. Oh I know there are some who choose to be negative, but they are a small number, and like Harvey will fade away into the background. Now comes the really hard part… The rebuilding for so, so many… But just like when Harvey was trying to break our will and our spirit. I truly believe we will see the strength, resolve, compassion and love of Texans. That huge needle and thread will become a hammer, saw and nails. I hope the world keeps watching because Texans believe in actions, not words and the lessons they teach are Huge, because everything is bigger in Texas! We are Houston Strong, We are Texas Strong! I am sure Harvey and maybe even a few others learned….Don’t Mess with Texas!

Red-Angry Blue-Sad

We are so honored to have an amazing blogger as our guest blogger this week! She’s an amazing mom… Who openly discusses her life. My hope is that after you read her blog… You come away with the same emotions/thoughts  that I did.. we need more mental health help!!! People need to stop talking and start doing.. this is not a political issue, this is a human issue! Please check out her other blogs here http://thoughtswithn.blogspot.com/

Also, We have her books for sale on our website https://teamawesomism.com/

 

I remember the day that I saw a piece of work completed by my oldest son. He was 6 at the time. His class was learning about emotions, and had them associated with colors. The piece of paper asked them to identify the 2 emotions they most commonly feel, and draw it in the associated color. His was Red – Angry, and Blue- Sad.

 

I remember the tears that sprung to my eyes. The feeling of failure I felt. My little boy was always angry at this point.

 

I had always struggled with him, since the beginning, but now it was at a new high. The Police were now involved, as he had begun threatening his baby sister.

 

Oh, and I was 6 months pregnant. I had high blood pressure, so I was supposed to be relaxing.

 

There, in front of me lay the evidence of the state of my sons mental health. He was so angry, and so sad. He didn`t know what to say, or how to say it, so his anger dragged on, day after day.

 

This was such a hard time for all of us. I have scars on me from his intense temper, and I am pretty sure my daughter is emotionally scarred.

 

Despite struggling for so many years, and trying to get him help, I had failed. The counsellor agreed that this paper was slightly alarming for a little boy, and sent off the papers for a Psychiatric Assessment.

 

We waited.

 

We waited.

 

Months and months went by. While my son struggled.

 

So many days I just wanted to run away and disappear. I questioned my capabilities of being a mother. I questioned how I was going to raise another boy. I have never in my life felt so lost as what I did at this time.

 

To be honest, I am not even sure how we all made it through. Maybe it is just the power of love. I one day told my son very clearly, I know you are angry, and I will be here whenever you are ready to talk, but there is not anything you can do to me to make me stop loving you, or to make me give up on you. You are my son.

 

We got the call for the assessment a year after the referral was placed. A YEAR. A family in a crisis situation, and such a sad and confused little boy.

 

We declined the assessment at this point, because he had already been through three and he was tired of doing it. No one saw what we saw. His intense temper. His neediness for everything to be a very specific way. His amazing abilities with numbers, and recognizing patterns. No one saw it. They always just told us, he is a very bright boy.

 

I decided, rather than trying to change him, I was going to accept him. Accept him exactly how he is.

 

He is almost 8 now. I can`t believe so much time has passed since my feelings of hopelessness. He is in Grade 2 and an intense math whiz. He still struggles with his temper, but he is far less violent.

 

Now he talks to me. He tells me what is wrong. Then we can figure out how to fix it.

 

You may not always be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I sure didn`t when I was locked in my room, trying to protect the baby in my belly, and my 1 year old daughter. I could not see any light in my life what so ever. I wanted to run away.

 

The light is there. It will shine.

 

Love

N 💜

Peyton….Autism….Perseverance

I came across this quote the other day “ Great works are performed not by strength but by Perseverance” Samuel Johnson

I immediately thought about Peyton and one of the things I admire most about him.. His Perseverance. He is adamant on Persevering, not necessarily the way you and I are, but in his own awesome way.

When he was 4, I was told he’d never read, write and probably not speak. While I was determined to help him in any way I could, I also accepted that if he didn’t read, write or speak that was okay. I was hoping he’d be able to do 2 of the 3… for his sake, not mine. I just wanted what was best for him.

i knew it was never going to be easy for him, but I also knew we were all in it to win it. My older kids and I were really committed to supporting Peyton in any way  we could. We were his biggest support system, and we joined forces for him!

Fast forward to June 2018… Peyton is  graduating  High School with all A’s and B’s! And guess what? He reads, write and speaks!  He is knocking so many obstacles out of the park everyday. His senior year of High School has been his best year! Trust me,his classes are difficult and intense. It seems the bigger the obstacle, the harder he fights.

He has been so determined to Not let things get in his way. This isn’t to say it’s always been easy, it hasn’t. He has had setbacks and difficulties. He’s lost faith in himself and others, then again who among us hasn’t?

One thing I’ve seen and touches me the most is, his perseverance. He keeps on and on,until he overcomes the negatives. Like I said before, it may not be the way we think it should be done… but that’s okay!

merriam-webster definition of perseverance is:

: “continued effort to do or achieve something despite difficulties, failure, or opposition : the action or condition or an instance of persevering: steadfastness” 
no where in the definition does it say… there is only one way to achieve/overcome!
                                                                                    Peyton is my inspiration and drive for AwesomismMom, Team Awesomism…. and most of all he’s the perfect example of “Turning Autism into Awesomism” I’m so proud of him. I can’t believe he’s 18! He’s my “baby” knowing he’s out of High School excites and scares me.
We are starting  a new chapter in his book of life. I know there will be obstacles, challenges, successes and new achievements. Being an autistic adult isn’t something he or I have experienced before. We will face each day like we have the past… one day at a time.  I also know he isn’t facing his future alone. He has a strong support network around him, who truly love him!
I also know this…. no matter how difficult it may get… Peyton will persevere, because that’s what  Peyton does… he perseveres. As his mom ( and biggest cheerleader) I honestly couldn’t be prouder of him!