No place like home for the Holidays


I absolutely love my husband… To me he is the best husband on this planet. Being married to an oil guy means you have absolutely no set schedule. You live according to an “oil schedule” Which is just fine with me. I miss him when he’s gone, but our love is stronger than distance.

My husband was supposed to be home a week and a half before Thanksgiving… That didn’t work out… He got home on Thanksgiving day. We decided to have Thanksgiving with our third child, who lives close, on Sunday… We watched football and relaxed, on Thanksgiving. 🦃

I had this feeling that he wasn’t going to be able to be home when he thought he would be. I decided that I was going to decorate the whole house… Mind you we have 4100 ft.²… For Christmas, before he came home.

I usually have a rule that I don’t start putting any Christmas decorations up until Thanksgiving is over… I love Thanksgiving, it’s one of my favorite holidays and I don’t like to dismiss it, by having Christmas stuff up. This year I made an exception!

I wanted to make sure, that if my husband didn’t make it home for Christmas… That he still got to enjoy Christmas in our home. I absolutely positively love decorating… Very few people know this about me, but my background is interior design.…Even though I chose not to pursue it professionally, after college.

I love designing and decorating my own home. The holidays to me are like an empty canvas and I get to paint with passion and love. I go all out. This year was no exception. In fact this year I went above and beyond what I have done for the last five years combined.

I put a 7 foot plus tree in our sitting room… And I decorated it with all little white lights and lots of gold, silver with angels, beautiful ribbon etc. the rest of the room was decorated the same.

I did the lights down the staircase with Garland swags and bows… In our office I did our sports Christmas tree!  Each room in the house has a different theme.

Our family room and kitchen I put our family Christmas tree… And that was decorated with the ornaments that we’ve collected over the years from our children and family ornaments. Multicolored lights on the tree & fireplace.The fireplace has the garland and the stockings 

I must admit when I was all done, even though it was a lot of work, I loved it. I loved it even more when Mark walk through the door and I could see by the smile on his face, and that twinkle in his eyes how much he loved it!

As I said at the beginning of this blog my hubby is awesome. Doing things like this for him makes me happy.  He not only is an awesome husband… He is an amazing stepfather… He’s actually their dad. Peyton and my older kids all absolutely adore him.

Peyton helped me decorate the whole house… He loves the lights part,  which is so awesome for me because I get so frustrated when the light to get all tangled up! He has the patience of a saint.  😂🎄

In fact Peyton  even wrote a blog about why he loves Christmas lights so much! https://teamawesomism.com/merry-awesomism-christmas/

My hubby works very hard… He never complains… So making his Holidays a little bit better by having the house cozy, loving and festive is the least I can do. My goal was to have Mark feel ” There is no place home for the Holidays” I think I achieved that! I know he felt the love In every Christmas decoration! ❤️🎄❤️

Red-Angry Blue-Sad

We are so honored to have an amazing blogger as our guest blogger this week! She’s an amazing mom… Who openly discusses her life. My hope is that after you read her blog… You come away with the same emotions/thoughts  that I did.. we need more mental health help!!! People need to stop talking and start doing.. this is not a political issue, this is a human issue! Please check out her other blogs here http://thoughtswithn.blogspot.com/

Also, We have her books for sale on our website https://teamawesomism.com/

 

I remember the day that I saw a piece of work completed by my oldest son. He was 6 at the time. His class was learning about emotions, and had them associated with colors. The piece of paper asked them to identify the 2 emotions they most commonly feel, and draw it in the associated color. His was Red – Angry, and Blue- Sad.

 

I remember the tears that sprung to my eyes. The feeling of failure I felt. My little boy was always angry at this point.

 

I had always struggled with him, since the beginning, but now it was at a new high. The Police were now involved, as he had begun threatening his baby sister.

 

Oh, and I was 6 months pregnant. I had high blood pressure, so I was supposed to be relaxing.

 

There, in front of me lay the evidence of the state of my sons mental health. He was so angry, and so sad. He didn`t know what to say, or how to say it, so his anger dragged on, day after day.

 

This was such a hard time for all of us. I have scars on me from his intense temper, and I am pretty sure my daughter is emotionally scarred.

 

Despite struggling for so many years, and trying to get him help, I had failed. The counsellor agreed that this paper was slightly alarming for a little boy, and sent off the papers for a Psychiatric Assessment.

 

We waited.

 

We waited.

 

Months and months went by. While my son struggled.

 

So many days I just wanted to run away and disappear. I questioned my capabilities of being a mother. I questioned how I was going to raise another boy. I have never in my life felt so lost as what I did at this time.

 

To be honest, I am not even sure how we all made it through. Maybe it is just the power of love. I one day told my son very clearly, I know you are angry, and I will be here whenever you are ready to talk, but there is not anything you can do to me to make me stop loving you, or to make me give up on you. You are my son.

 

We got the call for the assessment a year after the referral was placed. A YEAR. A family in a crisis situation, and such a sad and confused little boy.

 

We declined the assessment at this point, because he had already been through three and he was tired of doing it. No one saw what we saw. His intense temper. His neediness for everything to be a very specific way. His amazing abilities with numbers, and recognizing patterns. No one saw it. They always just told us, he is a very bright boy.

 

I decided, rather than trying to change him, I was going to accept him. Accept him exactly how he is.

 

He is almost 8 now. I can`t believe so much time has passed since my feelings of hopelessness. He is in Grade 2 and an intense math whiz. He still struggles with his temper, but he is far less violent.

 

Now he talks to me. He tells me what is wrong. Then we can figure out how to fix it.

 

You may not always be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I sure didn`t when I was locked in my room, trying to protect the baby in my belly, and my 1 year old daughter. I could not see any light in my life what so ever. I wanted to run away.

 

The light is there. It will shine.

 

Love

N 💜

Peyton and his cousin Sutton

I’m the youngest in my family, I was the third child… My brother and sister are 10 and 12 years older than me. When I was growing up that was referred to as a trailer.

I somewhat remember my brother being in the house, but I was only six when he went to college. I  remember my sister more. Both my siblings went to college and got married. So they never moved back into the house, except for during the summer.

My sister’s oldest boy, was in someway  more like a brother to me than a nephew because our closeness in age. When he had his son, I looked at him a more like my nephew, not my nephew’s  son.

My nephew sons name is Sutton , he’s adorable, funny and really smart. Of course I am a bit biased, but there you go!

He came over to our house this past Monday… To hang out with Peyton… in age they are nine years apart… But they get along so well.

They had such a great time together, it was so much fun to listen to them and watch them. They played Nerf guns, Minecraft, they tossed the baseball around, as well as a couple other fun things.

I really loved watching them play games where they ran around, as well as use their mind to figure out how to do things. Too many kids just want to sit and play video games all the time. So I love it when Peyton does physical exercise while playing.

He gets along really well with Sutton, and I love how patient Sutton is with him. If Peyton doesn’t understand what Sutton is telling him… he takes the time to explain it. That means a lot to me. Peyton is always very happy when he’s with Sutton, I love that I don’t have to worry about his feelings getting hurt.

Sutton is an only child, so it’s actually really cool to me they have each other. Even though Peyton has three older siblings, they are all out of the house. Since they are cousins, they also have that family connection, as well as a friendship.

I love that Peyton has people in his life that he learns different life lessons from. We all seem to teach him something different, but more important Peyton teaches all of us something…..….

It was adorable because a couple of times my sister asked Sutton if he was ready to go home… He wasn’t ready and Peyton wasn’t ready for him to go. They played their little hearts out, Peyton was exhausted Monday night.

Peyton and Sutton  may be cousins, but I think in their hearts they love each other like brothers… Being an older parent and having Peyton being younger and autistic, it warms my heart to know that he has people around him who really love him and will love him.

The boys have plans to do more things together… And that makes me really happy… Like I said earlier in my blog… I looked at my nephew Troy like a little brother, and I absolutely love it that my son and his son, love each other like brothers.

 

The Unconditional Love of a shelter dog

Both Mark and I love animals…so when my third child started working at the local animal shelter, I knew we would end up adopting at least one animal! I have always had pets of one kind or another….as a kid I had gerbils, dogs etc….

At one point or another…when my older kids were younger we went from dogs to cats …..we always seemed to have a pet around.

I loved having dogs and cats and that rubbed off on my kids. My third child has a real passion for animals and has the perfect temperament for the career he has chosen.

The first dog that we adopted from the shelter, was Tex. I absolutely loved Tex from the first day I saw him. He’s a Bernese Mountain dog mix, and has the sweetest temperament of any dog I’ve ever had.

Tex was young when we got him, he had been neglected and abused. It broke my heart! I remember seeing him in the cage at the shelter, his eyes looked at me and said “please help me!”

We didn’t take him the first time we saw him. When we went back the next day to get him, someone was adopting him. It broke my heart. 💔

I really didn’t feel like adopting a dog that day, because I really want Tex. So my husband and I decided to go back the next day. Guess who was there?!? Yes, TEX!

The people had returned him, and this was Tex’s  third return so he wasn’t long for the shelter, if you know what I mean. There was no way I was going to allow that to happen.

Needless to say, Tex came home with us that day, and has been a very loved member of our family ever since!

Tex has been with us now for over four years,  I never regret getting him from the shelter! He’s such a good dog and so loving.

When Peyton was young he was scared to death of dogs. He would have a meltdown if a dog came to close to him. It wasn’t until about six and a half, seven years ago that he started to actually not be afraid of dogs.

When we first brought Tex home I could tell he was a little afraid of him, partially because Tex is such a big dog. Thank goodness Tex has such an easy-going disposition.

As the years went by Peyton became more and more attached to Tex……And it’s so cute to see them now such big buddies!

Peyton feeds Tex, walks him and is his basic caregiver. It was so cute when Peyton would be doing his schoolwork, Tex would be laying by him on the floor.

What I love most, seeing how Peyton went from being so scared of dogs, that he would have meltdowns… to him having Tex as his  emotional support  dog.

I’ve so often thought about the day at the shelter, when Tex looked at me almost to say help me… And smile and think how much he helped us. His unconditional love for Peyton, and Peyton’s unconditional love for him is such an awesome thing!

Never underestimate the love of a shelter dog! Please visit your local animal shelter,  there are so many animals waiting to be loved, but more importantly to love you unconditionally!

Adopt Don’t Shop!

https://www.aspca.org/

http://www.humanesociety.org/

 

 

Peyton’s Inspirational Sign

The other day Peyton got this Inspire sign: he really loves it.  I was looking at it and realized the words on it, really described Peyton! He’s such an amazing and inspiring young man. I especially love the second part of the description… (2) “To awaken a particular feeling in somebody”.

He inspires, awakens etc… love, strength, patience, goals, effort, enthusiasm etc…. The best part of it is, he doesn’t even realize how much he inspires others.

I’ve said this many times in my blogs, how sweet he is. He really has a sweet heart and genuinely cares about others. He worries about others with such a pure and open heart. He doesn’t enter a “relationship” with preconceived ideas, thoughts or views. He takes everyone at face value.

I envy that about him, I wish I had that kind of trust and positive vulnerability … meaning he allows people to show him who they are, without deciding who they are. This isn’t to say he likes everyone… rather that he gives you the opportunity to be his friend. He’s optimistic that you are who you present yourself as . When he cares, he cares with a full and open heart.

It goes without saying that Peyton is the inspiration behind AwesomismMom…but even deeper than that … He’s the inspiration for “Team Awesomism Turning Autism into Awesomism” I’ve told him for years.. he has Awesomism not Autism. He’s the special one.. the rest of us in the family are “the same”  While we all know we are all individuals, Peyton is extremely special to us in so many positive ways.

I love watching Peyton when he’s in situations he feels comfortable in, like his Prom. He’s so happy, calm and engaged. He enjoys companionship, especially with others who take the time to connect with him.

He’s getting better about feeling comfortable in all settings. I’ve watched him go from a  shy, insecure, scared kid to someone who actually wants to go outside his “comfort zone”

The last 8 months have been a roller coaster… I’ve had some serious health issues. In the past Peyton would have stressed nonstop. Instead he faced the  situation at hand and dealt with it! We are so proud of him.

I’ve been stressing about our new project… “Team Awesomism Turning Autism into Awesomism” I sat down with him the other day with a LONG to do list. I asked him to look at it and tell me what he thought he could help me with, because I was feeling overwhelmed. He looked at me and said “ If we want to do this project, then we have to do this whole list, right?”

Remember (2): to awaken a particular feeling in somebody?

Peyton woke my feelings of strength, goals, determination, perseverance, drive……..I realized if Peyton doesn’t see obstacles then why should I? I’ve been so busy feeling overwhelmed and stressed about everything I HAVE to do for this project…. I forgot my own rule.. walk then run.

Peyton is right we have to get it ALL done, so instead of just having an overwhelming “To Do” list I need to have a To Do list … set by priorities.

Thank you Peyton… for once again being my inspiration….. You are a wonderful example of “Turning Autism into Awesomism” 💙

Watch for my next blog…. about our new and awesome project!! I think you will really be inspired. In the meantime here is Peyton’s twitter @PeytonAwesomism his Instagram PeytonsYearofAwesomism and his Flipboard ( which is his favorite) 😎 http://Check out my Flipboard magazine, Peyton’s Year Of Awesomism http://flip.it/KbJKTd